2002-03-15 - 1:24 a.m.
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WAHOOOOOOOOO! SPRING BREAK! YEAH WOOHOO...hey just when are we supposed to get rowdy? - Milhouse (not the band)
"Someone at SuicideGirls.com thinks you're cute..."
I hate it when spam fucks with my head. That was really fucking uncalled for. I don't want to use your shitty service of goth chicks writing diaries and showing thier boobs for the low low low price of any self worth, and $19.95 monthly (credit cards taken of course).
Don't fuck with my head. I spent a whole 30 seconds waiting for that site to open up, just curious at what the hell this might be. And that whole time I felt like it was going to be something cool and it ends up being perverted diaries and porno sites.
It killed longing.
I used to sit when I didn't have anyone for a while and smile, a break where I can sit free as a person and enjoy breathing every breath, knowing I had to care for no one but myself.
But then I got tired of being alone. Now it's just an empty box, almost a cage. This dorm room is a step down from the suite I used to stomp around. A place I'd like to visit.
But dormant dormitories are not a good Spring Break, and I wish I could have gone on the Harris/Roller Holster tour, just to be another person to cheer them on as they try to make it on thier own.
I don't have a crowd in alone.
So I'm a little glad it's time to go to Long Island. For a Spring Break away from it all. Home to hostage situations in Staples and shootings in a mass service, killing a priest. Your childhood innocent playground being bullied by psychotic madmen, stalking in places you'd normally tread had you been at home.
MY fucking cousins live 3 blocks away, for fucks sake. What could I do about it if I'm up in this shitbox dorm room, shoved up the mountain's asses in Champlain Valley? My cousin JoRo...too young to defend against the evils of society.
I come home for a break. A break from class and responsibilities. I come for leisure and relaxation, a jump from rancid 30 degree weather to plush 50-60 degree weather at home (and since there isn't much wind chill on Long Island, it's going to be a 30 degree difference. Like going long sleeve to t-shirt in no time flat).
I miss my humoungous bed. I am lucky enough to have been provided with a big bed and I cannot wait to use it.
I feel bad about that when I sleep on a crappile of bedsprings they call a bed. I put an eggcrate thing on and it's like resting softly on pavement. I feel like I'm camping out for showtickets every night of my life.
I have tickets to see the Count Basie Orchestra the tuesday I get back with Jenn. I bought both of them for 4 bucks total. 4 bucks for 2 people to go hear the Count Basie Orchestra. That's like people walking around handing out beers for like 3 dollars a 24 pack. Finally some musical culture in this rathole town. Like Lowell in Plattsburgh; Can't go there, bring it here.
It's never going to match it. But it's LIKE it.
I should play my guitar more. First I have to finish my 2 short stories, my poetry book, my homework, my novel, setup me and Shpunt's chapbook, make logos for a T-shirt, buy myself a birthday present to be opened on my birthday, celebrate St.Patty's Day, work for Mom for money, drinky, sleepy, eatty, writey.
But first, beat tomorrow.
BMC
What did you just say? - What's he gonna say next?
