2003-05-28 - 1:29 p.m.
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This makes little to no sense (pornographic)
So I was running around on the internet today and I came across this webcam. I don't like webcams, because they're usually someone sitting there with even less to do than you do because they have to film themselves to entertain themselves. And it was of this kid having sex with his girlfriend, in I guess her room because it didn't look like a guy's room. That's not really the point. The point was that this kid was having sex with his girlfriend on the internet and it was the blandest thing I've ever seen in my entire life. The point of having sex on film, if you're going to bother webcasting it, I figure would be to entertain someone at least other than the person you're having sex with.
I don't have webcam sex, so I'm just guessing here.
But not only did nothing happen to entertain, but it even looked like neither one of them was even interested in what was going on, namely them having sex. Neither of them made noises really, it was eerily quiet kind of. Only slapping sounds. That aside though, the guy was looking all around the room, at the bookcase, at the webcam, probably at the computer to make sure it was still filming I guess. Anywhere but the girl he was having sex with, if you could even call that sex at that point. And the girl looked like she was reading a book or doing her nails without the book or nailpolish there. It was the single most bored moment I've ever seen for someone who was being fucked doggystyle. You'd think the situation alone would be interesting, but this one moment managed to suck every ounce of pleasure, enjoyment, love, tenderness, compassion and fun out of sex once and for all, like if this was the instruction manual for sex, no one would ever be born ever again.
I don't want people to think I'm some kind of pervert who runs around cyberspace rating amatuer webcam fucking - this is a one time thing. Personally, if I was to watch any porn, I'd want it to be done by people who look nothing like real people look, people who are so fake and done up that it almost looked ridiculous, because we probably all look silly having sex in real life and video taping it is probably not a good idea. Normal, everyday, "hey we're both horny let's have sex" sex is boring to watch, but fun to do. Like golf.
On a different, non-porn note, I saw another headline on Yahoo! when I checked my mail that made me sad inside. "Spelling bee opens with 21 right answers". The National Spelling Bee opens up with 21 kids knowing how to spell words and it's fucking news. The whole point of the competition was to spell words. They're actually getting excited when people are doing what they're supposed to do. And another thing: it's a goddamn spelling bee. I don't know any time in history after the advent of spell checkers and dictionaries where it will be neccessary to know how to spell 16 letter words off the top of your head. Seeing as we don't use those words in every day language anyway, that area of those kids brains have been spent up knowing how to spell affenpinscher or deipnosophist off the tops of their heads instead of remembering their home address or their telephone number or which side of the fork the food goes on. I spell terribly and my grammar is atrocious, if you haven't seen here already, and yet I have a degree as an English major, thanks to dictionaries and the spell check. Because someone already figured out how to spell it for you and now you can just steal all their hard work with minimal effort. Giving people trophies for doing things the hard way is like rewarding someone for climbing the side of their office building to get to work because the elevator was too easy for them. The fact that there is even a National Spelling Bee, that enough people in the country care about how to spell fomorian without using a book, makes my heart sad because someone had to spend all the money to get this thing together to give out huge goldplated chunks of wood for being smart. If you were really smart, you'd figure that you didn't need a huge chunk of wood to prove you can spell.
You'd just be able to do it.
BMC
What did you just say? - What's he gonna say next?
